Nobrainer’s Think Tank

Yesterday, literally yesterday, it occurred to me that it had been a few months since my last unsolicited, BS email from Senator Rob Portman (R-OH). Finally, I thought, they had invested the time and energy to make sure that the little “unsubscribe” link actually worked. Victory. Victory I say… is short lived. Guess which putz senator from Ohio spammed me today. Go ahead. Guess.

If you guessed Senator Rob “Eff you I spam whoever I effing want” Portman, you win a lifetime supply of pork-product emails. This is absurd.

He’s right, you know:

There are some in congress right now who would rather see their opponents lose than see America win

They’re called Democrats.

Per USA Today, Obama “stressed that ‘no one party will be able to dictate where we go from here.’” That’s good to know, but is he implying that, at least at some times over the last two years, the single party in charge, was dictating? If he is implying that, he is correct, but it still seems like something odd to say.

I also found this paragraph to be cringeworthy:

[Obama] is seeking “the right balance” between new regulations to make sure that companies are treating customers fairly, and “making absolutely clear that the only way America succeeds is if businesses are succeeding.”

I wouldn’t exactly say the business environment is great right now. So it shows the extent of the Great One’s rectal-cranial inversion that he is even worried about this balance at this point. Heaven forbid we end up with lower unemployment at the risk of some of us facing an overdraft fee.

I read this AP article this morning, and it brought to mind an exchange from the movie Trainspotting. In it Sick Boy details his grand theory. The exchange ends thusly:

Renton: So we all get old and then we can’t hack it anymore. Is that it?
Sick Boy: Yeah.
Renton: That’s your theory?

So the article was about health care.

The budget office concluded that premiums for people buying their own coverage would go up by an average of 10 percent to 13 percent, compared with the levels they’d reach without the legislation. That’s mainly because policies in the individual insurance market would provide more comprehensive benefits than they do today.

For most households, those added costs would be more than offset by the tax credits provided under the bill, and they would pay significantly less than they have to now.

That’s the fucking plan? That’s the savings? The savings plan is to force prices higher and say they’re lower by adding further complication to the tax code via new credits? Brilliant!

Geezus. It’s 9AM and I’m so ready for a Guinness.

I just saw a commercial that said something like “if you walk 30 minutes a day, you’ll live a year longer!” Or, if you do the math, if you walk 30 minutes a day, every day, for about 50 years, you’ll extend your life by the same amount you spent doing all the walking.

I think I’d rather have a drink instead.

I’m getting sick of his “everything is on the table [except for all the things that aren't].” Of course what he actually said, this time, was [emphasis mine]:

“We’re going to continue to explore each and every avenue that I can think of that will lead to job creation and economic growth,” he said while standing with Transportation Secretary Ray LaHood and four construction workers wearing hard hats.

Here’s a tip for Mr. Super Genius Nobel Peace Prizing President Obama: explore ideas that other people have thought of you pompous ass!

Outside of that, let me thank the people of the country. Thank you for sending your money to people like me.

Obama spoke from the top of a large mound of dirt and gravel, the site of a highway construction project in the Virginia suburbs outside Washington. He chose the site of the Fairfax County Parkway Extension project to feature the progress of the stimulus package passed earlier this year.

The project is the state’s largest stimulus-funded project. When completed, it will connect both ends of Fairfax County.

Thank you, America for sending money to my county, Fairfax, VA, one of the wealthiest counties in the country, so that we can build more roads for ourselves with your money. According to Forbes last year, Fairfax county had the highest median income of any county in the country. And that’s where Mr. Greatness Obama thought it was a good idea to show off how stimulus money was being spent. Seriously, he traveled all the way across the river to the fucking DC suburbs to show off how well he’s spending America’s money on America’s rich by “creating jobs” where the unemployment rate is only 4.5% Fucking dolt!

PS – Don’t get too mad at me, Obama, I did check my tire pressures this week. So now we can call off that whole global warming deal.