Nobrainer’s Think Tank

At a time when the government is (foolishly) dumping cash on renewable energy research, we have several government officials who object to the actual use of renewable energy.

He said the project would generate $25 million in annual energy savings. Denmark’s offshore wind farms, similar to Cape Wind’s proposal, have had little effect on property values, he added. The turbines would appear as specks from the shoreline, he said.

An unusual alliance has formed to block the project in Congress, including Kennedy and two Alaska Republicans.

The blocking provisions would give Massachusetts Gov. Mitt Romney, a likely Republican candidate for the White House who strongly opposes the project, veto power over the wind farm.

Looks like I’m going to have to start my own country. Anybody got any leads on previously undiscovered continents with easily displaceable native populations?

Tonight’s Dateline NBC program is “To Catch a Predator 4.” The gist is that “consultants” from Perverted Justice pretend to be young girls online trying to catch pedophiles — which they do, very well apparently.

But let’s be more specific. All these guys are caught trying to have sex with underage teens… underage teens who claim to be home alone and looking for sex. Some of these guys are driving many hours to do the deed.

First, I have to question the consultants who work long hours pretending to be teenagers seeking sex. Aside from when I was a teenager seeking sex, I have never, ever, had any reason or desire to be in — or pretend to be — in that situation again.

Second, this probably has a lot of parents all worked up about all these predators. Where does this problem pop up, however? Where teenagers are seeking sex with adults. I’ll say that again so it sinks in: teenagers are seeking sex with adults. If you are a parent of a teenager, you don’t have much to worry about if your children are not actively seeking sex. If they are actively seeking sex with adults, they’re probably doing the same with guys their age. You have much bigger problems than what some pervert elsewhere wants to do.

Finally, if all these guys are driving hundreds of miles, I’m betting that the actual incidence and/or availability of teenagers seeking sex is quite limited — I’m just guessing here.

Sadly, this is the best thing on TV tonight. Although, this sting is in Ohio. I’m secretely hoping someone I know (and preferably hate) from back home will show up. We shall see.

It just doesn’t have the same ring as CuuuuuUUUUUUUUUUP! But, a horse race is a horse race. And drinking at a horse race is drinking at a horse race.

On the upside, Foxfield is only about 5 miles from town. Unlike its Carolina counterpart, I won’t have to be prepared for a 3 hour bus ride at a very early 7 on a Saturday morning.

As the excitement about the event grows, the high temperatures in the area have shrunk by about 10 degrees. Clouds have moved in. Optimistically, Accuweather forecasts Saturday to be “[m]ostly sunny; beautiful in the afternoon.” I’m calling for “cool with periodic showers and drunken tomfoolery.”

Since I’ll be occupied for the next few days, I’ll close with some unrelated closing remarks to tide you over. In no particular order:

Congress sucks. Whiny, entitlement driven Americans suck. Hangovers suck. And to steal a phrase from a rotund youngster from Colorado, “screw you guys, I’m going home.”

It’s been a good day: beautiful weather, got a lot of work done, no hiccups, etc. Plus I finally got due dates for my final work of the semester. Both dates are a week later than I had estimated.

And, just now, I came up with the idea for my final project: a thermodynamic finite element model of a turducken.

BRILLIANT!

(Nobrainer’s second thought: what aspect of beer deserves a good finite element treatment?)

In the debates over technology for energy, the final yardstick is usually the actual cost to produce a unit of electricity. The inherent assumption is that the consumer will choose the electricity that costs the least. If that idea were applied to food, alcohol, clothing, or even water, the assumption is proven horribly incorrect. Why is it people are convinced to over-pay for Starbucks, or Pepsi, or Aquafina — and do so happily — but we assume that the same cannot be true in the electricity markets?

To mind, there are two issues that need to be addressed. Many of us are not exactly subjected to open markets, from which we can choose from whom we purchase our electricity. Secondly, electricity doesn’t carry a brand very well.

Let’s creatively solve both problems simultaneously. Concerned parties may argue that removal of price caps will lead to increased prices across the board, thus hurting everyone and regressively hurting the poor. Or they’ll argue that consumers will merely switch to the cheapest option (presumably dirty coal) which would be an environmental nightmare. This of course is the crux of our energy debate: cost vs. cleanliness.

Being as there is a Virginia Energy Choice website, I propose that we use that website while also building a system that involves… uhhh, damn. what’s the word… uh, CHOICE. (Pro-choice right? My electricity my choice! whoops, no place for sarcasm here.) Instead of offering merely a price to compare, however, create a small table breaking down the how the electricity is generated, and other basic information such as pollutant output. For example:

Once the consumer is able to make the right choice, it’s up to the marketers to create brands and make the consumer make the right choice. For example, right now I can opt to purchase wind power at a net price increase of about 50%. At least two problems remain: I found this information on my own and not because someone marketed it to me, and I’m not convinced that I should pay a 50% markup, even though I pay huge markups all over the place otherwise. I lied, there’s one problem: marketing — or a lack thereof.

Part of the marketing is branding. The non-minimum paying consumer wants, nay needs to be able to show off his or her choice. This may be done by simply putting a sign in the window, or a bumper sticker on the car. Let the consumer declare “I BUY BIG GREEN ENERGY.”

What’s more, the marketers need to make being green more than being environmentally aware. Make us want to do it because it’s cool. Don’t tell us it’s cool; show us it’s cool. Make guys think they will get laid.

Have a commercial with the Super Bowl winning quarterback surrounded by scantily clad women read:

I buy my electricity from Big Green. It’s a little more expensive, but it’s worth it for the future. Plus chicks dig it.

Can we at least agree that guys will do it if they believe it leads to sex?

Obviously I’m being a bit facetious, but I truly believe that we can be convinced to pay higher energy prices. What’s keeping us from it?

Since my move to Charlottesville in 2004, I have attempted to keep my aquarium stocked to a reasonable level with fish. During my last purchase several months ago, I was given one fish for free. I didn’t want it. I don’t even know what kind it is. For the last few months though, he has hung on as the soul survivor. He outwitted, outplayed, and outlasted all his tankmates — by a lot.

I’ve become convinced that he is some type of intelligence agent from the Soviet Union sent here to spy on me. The sneaky bastard got into my apartment and now he refuses to die. He’s got to be KGB, right?

Despite his sketchy background and potential threat to national security, I’ve grown to admire his ability to not die. Therefore, just this week, I finally named him: Boris AKA ‘the Blade’ AKA the ‘Bullet-Dodger.’ Why do they call him the Bullet-Dodger? ‘Cause he dodges bullets, Avi*.

Things didn’t look too rosy yesterday morning, however. I looked under the rock where he hides and he looked rather inert. It would figure, that right after I got attached, the bullet-dodger would die.

Fortunately, Boris must have just been having a bad morning. All is well. You may now rest easier at night.