Nobrainer’s Think Tank

We need strippers - lots of ‘em.

My day started off reading about the fresh Koran abuse charges this time coming from Pakistan. But something caught my attention:

Pakistanis freed from Guantanamo Bay claimed they saw American interrogators throw, tear and stand on copies of Islam’s holy book, and one former detainee said naked women sat on prisoners’ chests during questioning.
[…]
Rahman claimed female interrogators at Guantanamo stripped in front of prisoners despite pleas for them not to — echoing allegations leveled by other inmates, although not by the other five inmates who spoke to AP on Monday.

“Girls would interrogate us. They would take off their clothes in front of us. They would make different poses in front of us and they would sit on our chests,” said Rahman. “This was shameful.“

So maybe they weren’t necessarily hot naked women. But when you’re in a prison camp, there is absolutely no reason to be choosey. Perhaps today’s islamofascists have merely caught a case of the gay. I don’t know.

But there’s more naked news this time from India:

NEW DELHI (Reuters) - Women in an eastern Indian forest are stripping naked to distract police and to help a criminal gang avoid arrest while illegally chopping down trees, the Hindustan Times reported on Tuesday.

Some of the women belong to a timber mafia in the heavily-forested state of Jharkhand while others are paid to strip in front of the police, who are too embarrassed to arrest them or too distracted to hunt the gang down, the daily said.

[Side note: A timber mafia? Timber as in trees and wood? Where’s the gambling, bootlegging, illegal firearms, and illicit drugs? What a lame mafia! At least they’re on the right track with the strippers though.]

So all these mafiosos have to do to successfully get wood is convince some girls to take their clothes off? Why it makes so much sense it has to work.

Now let’s use this knowledge to defeat our enemies abroad. Instead of sending soldiers, send some sluts. Tell the sluts if they take their clothes off they’ll be in a movie. You can easily recruit plenty of them in Hollywood — or mobile home parks. The evidence I provided above clearly demonstrates that the key to victory in Southwest Asia is by shaming, embarrassing, or otherwise distracting the enemy with the beauty of the female form.